I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
True college students do jello shots in the library
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
