she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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