Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
