Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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