Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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