I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
