youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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