I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
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