How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
