Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
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