i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
