bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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