Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
