dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
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