Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Randomize
