I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize