I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Randomize