I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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