stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
