I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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