So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
