I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
