stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize