So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
