how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
