Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
