i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
