think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize