He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
