I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize
