What a fucking waste of an outfit
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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