Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
