Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
