My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
