Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
