good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
