i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize