I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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