So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
