Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize