I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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