babies were throwing up all over the place
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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