hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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