Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
