just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
