I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
