you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Randomize
