tell your sister to shave her snatch
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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