Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
