Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
