Christians are straight up FREAKS
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
