my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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